20191229_101159_nORMAL - - M4A 10.75 MB / 14:21

hello this is Greg. it's been a while since i recorded myself talking. sort of talking to my self and also i imagine someone who might care about me in the future will ... might find this and listen to all of it.

sorry it's slow and . . . like ethereal and unorganised, unplanned.

I started recording this because i wanted to write a journal. i wanted to type something. i wanted to ask,  What are your plans? and my answer is, I don't want any plans, or I want no plan, I don't want to have any plans, personally. Maybe everyone has a plan whether they think about it.

oh yeah, mom just left a few minutes ago to babysit while tim and chelsea go to see Knives Out.

I like how my voice is deep and rumbly. I've been coughing for a few days. My throat's sore and I felt like I had a fever the other day. I've been taking cold medicine and cough medicine. My sinus is fone i think. yeah my nose is fine. so i just stayed home. I'm glad mom didn't ask me to go with her.

I just started listening to Songs from the Bardo, again. It's one of my favourite things to listen to and think about. so many good songs, great songs, or not that many, just a few, ten, 15 really really good songs.....

uhm . .. i was reading Good Husbandry a little bit ago. I've read over a hundred pages in less than a week, which is a lot, way more than i've read in a long time. And uh, i feel kind of challenged by all the work that Kristin and Mark do. And I wanna give Aaron and Andee the copies of The Dirty Life and Good Husbandry. See what they think about Kristin and Mark and the Farm and the way of life. The Health and the Good Life. I also get annoyed sometimes with Kristin and Mark, like they try to do too much. It's too chaotic, and it's not a good way to do it. It's probably a better life than most people have, or much better life. But still they're too excited and ambitious and unreasonable, I guess.

When I started thinking about giving the books to Aaron, I started trying to think what he would think about it. They seem kind of ridiculous, but I think overall it's a really good thing, they're trying to give as many people a good diet as they can. I think having a 2nd child seems pretty crazy when they were already constantly working on the farm before they had their 1st child, and it seems like they're creating too many problems. No that the children are problems... children aren't problems, but the adults, the parents put them in awkward and meaningless and unproductive and unreasonable situations, so that nobody really has time to decide ( choose ) the best way to go about their lives. But, when I think these things, i think, Well, what's the point of living? And the way Kristin writes about it, it sounds like there are plenty of moments where she's able to really enjoy her life and all the hard work and suffering... I guess she doesn't... She suffers the suffering, but then she enjoys the ... food and the memories and the people... that grow living on the farm, living within the community of farmers and people who eat the farm.. eat the food . . .  haha [ : eat the farm. yep.

I'm pacing around a lot and I don't wanna do that. Um, anyway, so I might text Aaron today and ask him if I can come over tomorrow evening and give him the books, give them the books. I ate a couple, I ate one pig in a blanket, I think. I didn't feel that hungry, I had a cup of coffee with vanilla creamer. I wrote a little bit, I just added a couple lines to somethings I wrote yesterday. I pooed a little bit and it was really hard and there was a speck of blood on the toilet paper. Yesterday I made a bath with epsom salt, and I dipped my hand in while it was filling up and i drank a little water that had salts in it, because it's supposed to like make you poop. But it didn't seem like it did that much.

It's in the 50 degrees Fahrenheit. It's a little windy. I wanna listen to kNot by Big Thief... N. O. T.

I was thinking about Jojo Rabbit, how much I like it, everyone involved in it.

What else do I wanna say. I guess I'll just eat some...

Gonna listen to Dear Hank and John I think, or maybe I'll listen to Kristin Kimball. Yeah, I'm gonna search for some sort of audio interview of Kristin Kimball. That'll be nice. I've like, kind of fallen in love with her after watching the book readings on youtube. She's just extremely attractive [ laughing ] to me. hah, I really sounded weird when I laughed during saying attractive.

Oh uh, i think i'll stop recording this in a minute. Oh God, it's been 13 minutes. O yeah, 14 minutes is good.

It's not the energy reeling - not that long i was singing that song to myself and i was thinking, I could sing a really good cover of Not by Big Thief, it would sound, i could sound pretty similiar to Adrienne Lenker, who I also think is very attractive.

Anyway, I really like the titles, The Dirty Life and especially Good Husbandry. I think Aaron and Andee might appreciate the way Kristin thinks about marriage and the Good Life and yea... the way you have to make your own meaning and be the good that you want to see in the world, or something like that.

Anyway, uhh    love you. I'll talk to you soon.